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Listen Show PodCast
Unleash the Arsenal long-reads, Spygate super-schadenfreude & a Bundesliga hoax
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Labour's laboured footballspeak, thumpable scorelines & penalty pop-ups
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The Football Cliches Quiz XXIV: Cliches vs The Sweeper - The Rematch
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Corner-kick chaos, a Premier League without a W & Joe Cole at the Ritz
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The 9.75 role, Tom Hiddleston's Champions League mindset & the Faroese Andy Gray
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The fixture pile-up threshold, Sean Dyche playing "Sean Dyche" & under-10s trophy parades
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Team-talk mythology & the stickers of European toilet cubicles: The listeners' loves & hates
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Great adverts for the pyramid, technicians of the sphere & Qatar to Coventry in 3 minutes
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Elite barbers' FPL advantage, the Collins-Tomkins dilemma & doing The Terrestrial
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Lee Dixon on toast, “advantage City” & a commentator's Copacabana complex
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Unexpected Stevenage, premature hauntings & the Premier League goal caught on CCTV
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Half-and-half Shakespearean scarves, scouting for Shevchenko & the half-dozen crisis
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The Football Cliches Quiz XXIII: Cliches vs Career We Go
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FA Cup lustre status, Ally McCoist's cliche mashup... and every Premier League game ever
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The Extinction XI
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Biggleswade bragging rights, Tanzania 0 Liechtenstein 1 & Keysey's perfect Christmas
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Football vs The Dictionary: Susie Dent on bus-parking & bouncebackability
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The Carabao Supremacy, yodelling commentators & the absolute Joe Hart
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GoPro goalkeepers & textbook crossfield-pass apologies: The listeners' loves & hates
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”My baby looks like Gary Megson", MOTD donking & in dreamland with Bodo/Glimt
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BBC live-text sad lads & watching football in the boozer, with Jimmy "Dead Pubs" McIntosh
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FA Cup scares/dumpings/cruises, dark orange cards & Roman gladiator VAR
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The freefall threshold, Benjamin Sesko's windows & the streets forgetting Santiago Munez
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Co-commentary cues, flopping full-backs & the "one of our own" threshold, with Lucy Ward
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The 5-a-side keepers' union & World Cup pub bunting: The listeners' loves & hates
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Literally ghosting, Larry David's Champions League commentary & Sir Alex's 2011/12 title curse
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Hoddle's Curse strikes again, the world-record fans' favourite & a saucy U-turn
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The Forest-Watford Vortex, champagne players & Pep vs Daffy Duck
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Generic Spurs punditry, regurgitating possession & ding-dong stalemates: The 500th episode
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Introverted full-backs, radio commentary synchronicity & the Champions League of trees
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”Absolute wimp", Arsenal's pre-ignited quadruple & a Doha denouement
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Scorpion scepticism, 80% ball knowledge & Conor Coady's Football Clubs (2026 edition)
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Flats that overlook stadiums & the optimum time for Sky Sports News: The listeners' loves & hates
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The "what's eating Erling Haaland?" threshold, FA Cup anthem fears & Gary Weaver's Circle of Goals
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Zohran Mamdani's PL Years & a chat with Éanna Hardwicke on playing Roy Keane in Saipan
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The moment the AFCON final peaked, Wenger's Law & football gestures at bus stops
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Properly getting out, cricketing ASMR, and shadow umpire’s call
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Shane Todd on post-save goalkeeper emotions & professional footballer-botherer Rio Ferdinand
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Semenyo's 0.028% return, six nicknames in 15 seconds & Scotland's bottom dogs
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41-year-old blokes playing for prime Barca, Ken Barlow's terrace anthem, and the Sir Alex blessing
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Resurgent corner flags, Eddie Howe's onslaught threshold & "the Pound Shop Potter”
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Snake pits and minefields, the shadow follow-on, and catching on camera
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That Man DCL, heading your granny & clowns in Slough bunkers
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Domestic shadow-batting, no mugs, and spectator stress
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Absolute dreamland: The Best of Football Clichés in 2025
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Glove-spitting goalkeepers & edge-of-the-D drama at five-a-side: The listeners' loves & hates
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North-east river supremacy, David Moyes' giant duck & Keysey's nutmegs
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Tricky little sessions, daddy hundreds, and getting hit "amidships"
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Unexpected Clive Tyldesley noises & Gabriel's hypothetical Arsenal own-goal hell
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Uzbekistan vs Colombia at 3am, the Infantino Shrug & a dubious bagsman
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I Wanna Dance With Peter Drury, grinding out a 5-4 & Haaland's League One future
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Commentator's curse conspiracies, homegrown stewards & Lee Hendrie's "highgevity”
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Expected leaves, driving "on the up" & absolute Ebony Rainford-Brent
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The Football Cliches Quiz XXII: Cliches vs Career We Go — The Decider
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Arsenal's official title status, Idris Elba's prefix woe & the verb "to goal”
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Lashing/dabbing a seed/cherry, moral victories, and why do the Aussies hate Bazball?
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The "Club X til I die" loophole & torn hamstrings at the Battle of Hastings: The listeners' loves & hates
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Premature dark-horsing, false-nine nostalgia & introducing... Cricket Clichés
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On toast in his pocket, pulling up trees & The Number-and-a-Half XI
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Accidentally patronising commentary, the Battle of the Big Dan B's & Keysey meets Piers
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Vittorio Angelone on orchestral anthems, Lev Yashin's cap, and badge-avoiding classy touches
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”Cool as custard”, Reo-Coker's hanky-panky & football's reigning Great Entertainers
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Rob Morgan on FA Cup engraving, football rhyming slang & overrated wondergoals
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Five football clubs in 10 seconds, Ekitike's non-haunting & prime minister Martin Keown
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Scottish League Two scores, leaked fines lists & the sixth penalty taker: The listeners' loves & hates
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Live show legends, Liverpool's 18ft 10in strike force & a new Neville noise
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The Cape Verdean Dan Burn, Keysey the actor & the Communication XI
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Own-goal flavours, casual retirements & football clubs as sperm counts
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England's 25th-choice right-back & the definitive Movement XI
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Blown-open title races, punditspeak on the terraces & Woltemade's weird penalty
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xG's latest victim, Jamie O'Hara vs the RAF & football's goldfish bowls
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The last corner flag, acres of experience & Christianity's classy touches
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Playing for your dad's team & mercifully short injury time: The listeners' loves & hates
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5.88 EFL seconds, Andy Townsend in song intros & the "sick of the sight of him" threshold
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The Jose Mourinho box office & a one-man war on factually incorrect football anecdotes
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Mowbray vs Brotherton, goalkeepers worth 12 points & Keith Andrews in the building
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Serbian statements, Ange's unfinished business & Cape Verde: the World Cup Blackpool
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The MOTD intro scandal, Taxman FC & the most "cat amongst the pigeons" goal ever
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The Football Cliches Quiz XXI: Libero
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Slot's embarrassment of riches, hyperliteral stadium noises & Zidane vs Dyche
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Panenka-triggered goalkeepers & empty-net warm-up anxieties: The listeners' loves & hates
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Dyche goes dating, Dean Ashton's defensive doughnut & textbook piledrivers
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Champion flatulence, football punditry sat navs & Sean Dyche X Big Sam
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Vertical highlights, Farage's footballspeak & Stockley Park's canteen crisis
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8.55 seconds in Wrexham, Celeste's Sky Sports flame is out & niche 2025-26 predictions
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Curtain-raising issues, Wycombe's new goal verb & things you cannot be "amid”
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Conor Coady's football club, alphabetical top flights & the world's most generic team name
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Eastenders' Euro 2025 joy, #AccidentalCantona & "the most 2011 transfer of all time”
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The Football Cliches Quiz XX: The View From The Lane
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Goalkeepers' headers & elasticos on the deck of the Titanic: The listeners' loves & hates*
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The Agyemang Cacophony, the storm-weathering threshold & how clubs “get their man”
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Talispersons, textbook Turkish Super Lig & time limits for the commentator's curse
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The threshold for being "rudderless" & Tour de France riders as footballers
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Pre-season trophies, Iran in the Championship... and what happened to shin splints?
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Overage youth team mentors & the quickest repaying of a transfer fee ever
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Giving 40,000%, Test Match Andy Townsend & "Can you explore a swoop?”
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Wimbledon tennis players as footballers & the floodgates threshold
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Stopping Celeste's flame, pre-season lingo & Jhon Duran's reverse-gear career
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5-a-side injury updates & watching TV football from an acute angle: The listeners' loves & hates
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”The most involved-goals man", Swiss Army knives & watching the Roy Keane film trailer
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